An unbelievable business plan

BioCentury recently attended a business plan presentation for a product that is truly remarkable in its ambition. Following are excerpts of the CEO's presentation, which we think merits the attention of everyone in the industry:

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Good morning. Thank you for coming at this early hour. I see the hotel has done its usual fine job of supplying rich coffee, croissants and kiwi fruit.

Today we are tremendously happy to report that our company is about to launch a new drug product of unparalleled market potential. In fact, today I am here to promise you that our unique formulation of the drug, coupled to our fantastic marketing program, will put this drug in the hands of EVERY man, woman and child in the U.S.

Now a little background about our remarkable new product, which we expect to launch sometime in 1994 or 1995, and certainly no later than 1996.

We used a drug discovery process called Rationalized Drug Development. This proprietary system insures that we will come up with exactly the drug we are looking for, without any conflicting data to disrupt our timetable.

Rationalized Drug Development employs the talents of literally hundreds of experts in every relevant field, using the Thought Experiment process pioneered by Einstein and other famous theoretical physicists. In fact, for this presentation, I decided not to include a slide with our scientific advisory board, because it's so large that I cannot risk omitting the names of any deserving participants.

Enormous demand

I'm especially happy to report that the entire Rationalized Drug Development process was accomplished entirely with federal grant money in just a few months, enabling us to avoid venture capital or other forms of private capital. This has allowed our board of directors to remain focused on our agenda without the kinds of distracting issues that outside investors bring to the table.